Extremes

I never knew I could be as happy as I was over the last couple of months…The excitement, newness, challenges, and firsts were so much more wonderful than I could have ever dreamed…For the first time, I felt that I began to see a glimpse of God’s example of his love for us as his bride in my relationship with someone here on earth…I thought it the most amazing blessing possible, and I fully expected to continue to experience more and more of such a wonderful gift!

Short of dealing with the death of loved ones, I never knew I could hurt as much as I do now…I pray for the day I will be able to look back and have some glimpse of why it makes sense that he so unexpectedly chose to walk away – shattering all of the plans and dreams we had made together…I always knew he belonged to God, and that what He’d given, He had every right to take away…I thought I understood God’s plan, but I didn’t…and so…I’m not angry, simply broken – seeking healing, hope, and peace. So far, the memories overtake me consistently and without reprieve, and the hurt is intense but I have to trust that He will bring me through…and I couldn’t be more thankful for the friends and family that are loving me through it all…